...And it Sucks!
After a great night at the bar with friends, my flavor of the month and I headed back to my house. It was on like Donkey Kong. As soon as we stepped foot into the house, our clothes hit the ground. We made our way into my bedroom, strewn clothing in our wake, and get down to business.
It was glorious. He sucked on my breasts, he bit my lips, and he fisted his hands into my long locks all the while he was dominating me. I couldn’t help the loud moans that escaped my mouth; roommates or not. I pulled myself from his grasp and slowly, teasingly, worked my way down his torso until I reached the promise land.
I began sucking on his impressive member. I teased him, reveling in the gasps that escaped his mouth. He told me that he wanted to 69 and who was I to deny a man who wanted to go down on me.
We repositioned ourselves so that I was on top of him. I picked up my sensuous torture from where I left off; all the while he began his careful tongue assault on my core. While I was sucking on his head, I noticed that something was amiss.
He was using his index finger around my asshole.
No big deal. I’m into ass play. But this didn’t feel like your typical play. He was only sticking the tip of his finger in my hole and something just didn’t feel right. He then began wiping his index finger on the insides of my cheeks and then he pushed them together and said, “There. Now you’re stuck.”
I arched up, removed his penis from my mouth and said, “Are you fucking kidding me?!”
I was in disbelief. Never in all of my years did I ever think that this would have happened. Of all of the sexual mishaps in the world, this was the furthest away from my imagination.
I had gum in my ass.
Literally there was gum in and around my asshole. I got up and spent the better part of 5 minutes clearing the gum from my asshole and butt cheeks with a wash cloth. When I got back to bed, I was still seething. He tried to hug it out, but I was having no part in it. I didn’t even want to lay next to him. I left the room and proceeded to go cool off on the couch for a few hours. I eventually went back.
I have since calmed down and this is now a funny joke amongst our friends and even at our local bar, I am sweetly known as Sticky Buns. But let it be known, the anus is NOT the place to stow your gum during sex!