There is nothing worse then getting ready to share an intimate space with someone who you feel deeply for in that moment. I say moment, because whether it’s short or long term, that moment for me is full of intimacy. There is nothing worse then being with a partner who is over excited.

Having spent 8 years in a relationship with a man who had a huge d*ick i can honestly say that size is NOT everything. Every time we had sex it was if we were at the race tracks competing to see who could ‘finish’ first. He didn’t know that he was racing, but i spent 8 years mastering my orgasm to happen in 5minutes so that I could make sure and cum before he did. There is nothing worse then having that moment be reduced to a few minutes of rushed enjoyment to ensure a superficial sense of satisfaction.

Eventually it got to the point where i resented even having sex and would tell him to jerk himself off as i was too tired to try and race that night. He was an amazing guy, and the connection, love and intimacy was great. But the sex was just really insufficient and it took me a whole year after leaving him to retrain myself to slow down, take it easy and not try and race my partner to some imaginary finish line. Suffice it to say there was work I had to do even after he was gone to unlearn that! This bad sex didn’t just happen in those moments or for those 8 years, but having only been separate for 3 years, the bad sex from that guy has ricocheted into my future and is still something I have to make sure doesn’t creep in between the sheets with my new partner!

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